Chapter 1

It was amazing. The first few months of our relationship. So much passion. All I wanted to do was to make him happy, no matter what it took. I'd rush to do things for him, to spend time with him, to do everything and anything that I could within my capacity; and perhaps even more. I would hang on to his every word, do what he asked me to do, read whatever he asked me to read. It was exciting, discovering the depths of his love for me in the initial stages of the relationship. When I couldn't meet him, or spend time with him, I'd get angry with the people preventing me from doing so, although he told me not to get angry. The fullness of his love reached the depths of my soul, and I'd cry because it was just too amazing to be true. I'd tell everyone about his love for me, and how amazing he is and how people just HAD to meet him. 
A year passed by, and I grew up. I matured, in a sense. And he no longer was enough for me. His love was still amazing, but it did not touch me as it did at the start. I no longer placed him above everything else. Things began to take priority. Studies, CF, friends, family, serving and dreams. I sidelined him occasionally, spending time with him when I wanted to, pushing him aside when I had 'better things to do'. I still did things to please him, although sometimes albeit grudgingly. But it was amazing. He never forced me to do anything I didn't want to. But I did it because I remembered the depth of his love for me. I still got excited at times when I got to see him, but only at times. But more often than not, it was more of like a side thing when I remember that I'm seeing him that I go "Oh. Right. Seeing him today. YAY!" But it was no longer that constant joy and yearning to see or spend time with him. I no longer told people about his love; they only heard about it when they asked, and that's when I would tell them in a voice that sounds a bit more sensible, more matured compared to the excited, childish voice last time.
2 years passed. Maybe a little more. Our relationship didn't grow sour, but it just became...dull. It no longer had that spark. No more passion, no excitement. At least, that's what I felt on my part. He kept trying to show me how much he still loved me, despite all my flaws. And as I look back, it's amazing, how his love for me never diminished- not even one bit; although I had compartmentalized him in my life, when I was studying or out with friends. I guess, it eventually got to the stage where I really couldn't be bothered about our relationship anymore. I guess, I was still selfish. I still cared about whether he loved me as much as he used to; 2 years ago; but I couldn't be bothered to put back the passion into the relationship. I didn't care if I spent any time with him, although he waited for me to talk to him every night- without fail. 
And then. It deteriorated from there. I no longer cared about the relationship. I no longer wanted to do anything to pick the relationship up. I was just this close to giving the relationship up; if it weren't for his love. And the fact that we used to have a real relationship. I no longer listened to him at all. I guess he tried to tell me that he's still there in my life; still present, but I just couldn't hear it. Maybe I blocked it out. 
I'm just too tired. I'm on the verge of calling it quits, but I won't because we had such a real relationship. 
Maybe I need you to pick me up again. To let me know that you still love me as much as ever. And that you'll forgive me for all that I did; for all the hurt and disappointments. And that you'll welcome me back into your arms without a second thought. 
I want us to go back to where we were. Actually, I want to know you better. I want to have a stronger passion for you. And to learn to put you first above all else. And to not take your love and mercy for granted. I want to be that excited girl once again. 
This story does not have an ending. I hope there never will be. As of now, I don't know what's going to happen next, but I guess, I'll just have faith. (: